So you finally decided to take the plunge and join a personals web site, good for you. Now if you’re like most people you’ll be sat there staring at the profile and ad form and wondering just what should you write. I know from experience that those profiles can be a bitch to write at worst, partly because many of us myself included have difficulty writing about ourselves. With that in mind below I’ve listed some tips and hints I wrote this rough guide to writing effective personal ads.
Selling yourself: Think about it when you write a personal ad selling yourself is exactly what you are doing. In order to do that you need to stand out from the crowd. I know how hard it can be to achieve that and I’ve spent many hours perfecting my profile on various sites in order to get the best results and more importantly the type of people I want to answer my ads to take notice of them.
Take a look at other profiles and find a few that grab your attention, then sit down and work out why and how they grabbed you and made you read more. Maybe they were funny, maybe it was the honesty you found good but whatever the reason they grabbed you and pulled you in. Try and identify that element that pulled you in and use it in your own ad.
Be Honest: This maybe the Internet but you are looking to actually meet someone from this ad so be honest from the start. If you use a photo use a current one for example. If you’re 36 then say so, if you really are a brain surgeon then fine but if not don’t go there. You may think you’re life is boring and no one will want you but embellishing the truth or simply lying will get you nowhere.
Choosing A Handle Or Nick: Many web sites give you the opportunity to choose your own handle, nick/name. Think about your choice before you make it. Which of these sounds more enticing and gives the viewer the most information for example: Dave5900000 Kansas Toto Your Ad Title: Again this is something you should give some serious thought to as on many sites as you browse this is all people see before they click through to read your actual profile/ad. Make it simple, catchy but descriptive. For example if I lived in Kansas and was male I might title an ad:
Kansas Man looking for his Dorothy.
Or I could take it a step further and Use the nick Kansas Toto and make my title read: Lost in Kansas looking for my Dorothy. I’m sure you’re getting the idea by now. By choosing a nick that you can play with and incorporate into your title you are more likely to grab potential partners attention and that’s what the purpose of a good ad is. The Ad Itself:
Use a Spell checker!: Sounds simple when I write it but you’d be surprised at the amount of ads I’ve seen with basic spelling mistakes. Don’t forget the first thing I wrote about here this is about selling yourself. So you didn’t get an Yale education but that doesn’t mean you can’t spell. Impressions count and your ad is the first impression someone will have of you.
Never write in all caps: It’s annoying to read and in Internet speak it implies your shouting. That maybe fine in a crowded night club but in the world of personnel’s it’s annoying.
POST A PHOTO: Statistics show that an ad with a photo is 80% more likely to get a response. A photo that shows you relaxed and having fun, no matter what you look like, is even better. Don’t use a photo that’s 10 years old, people want to see what you look like now. Don’t stress about your looks… attraction is about more than looks and it’s why you’re spending time writing your ad.
You’re More Than Your Body: Many personal sites allow you space to list your physical attributes and most people will glance through them, although if you’ve added a photo their really is no need to. While looks are to some extent important to many of us when we are looking for a potential partner, far more important is the personality behind those stats.
Concentrate on telling potential respondents about you rather than the color of your hair or eyes. Many ads limit the amount of lines you have to use so make the most of what you have. Have you ever really dated someone just for their eye color? OK, maybe you have spectacular eyeballs. But ads tend to reel off personal stats… and then stop there, as though there was nothing but a body. Talk about who you are first, and what you look like at the end. Want to know the number one thing surveyed women look for in a guy? A sense of humor.
Be Positive: Your ad is not the place to list all the things that drove you nuts about your ex and how you won’t put up with that again. Don’t list what you don’t want… discuss what you DO want. Be creative turn what could be considered faults with a little lateral thinking into positives. So you’re a workaholic, how about, “life keeps me busy so my personal time is really special. ”
Favorite Things: Rather than making a breathtaking list of all your favorite things, concentrate on one or two and really play them up. If for example you enjoy hiking, use it to your advantage and incorporate it into your main ad. “Would love to meet partner who shares my love of walking,” for example, although I’m sure you can do far better than that!
General Rules: NEVER, NEVER, EVER include your address, phone number or last name in a personal ad. This might seem like common sense but I’ve seen people include this info in personal’s before. Some personal sites have rules that ask you not to post e-mail address or web addresses, make sure you follow the sites guide lines. Your ad will be removed and that’s a waste when you’ve spent so much time writing it. In general read the sites guidelines and you’ll be fine.
Which reminds me, keep a copy of any ad you write, especially if you’re using web sites to advertise. I know from experience servers crash and data gets lost. Above all remember to be yourself when you write your ad. You may think you’re boring but I’m willing to bet that with a little thought you can bring out your best qualities and show a potential partner that you have something unique to offer them: Yourself!