10 Things You Should Know About Sex Education

1. Today, we have more sexual information available than ever before in history. Sexuality has been studied, documented, and analyzed. We know about the G-Spot, multiple orgasms, female ejaculation, and dozens of sexual techniques and positions. Sex therapy and medical science can cure erectile dysfunction, premature ejaculation, and inorgasmia. We are bombarded by sex in our culture. We understand sexuality and know the mechanics of how it all works, yet on a personal level, studies show that overall sexual satisfaction is still on a steady decline. As a whole, people are more sexually empty, more sexually frustrated, and more sexually lost than ever before. I believe this is due mainly to a lack of the proper kind of sex education and our discomfort with the notion of discussing sex. Even though we have the information available to us, not many people talk about sex or seek out ways to make it better. Sex still seems to be a dirty little secret for many (if not most?) of us, yet nearly all of us have sex.

2. Having great sex is the only activity which requires a lot of knowledge and physical finesse but is nearly always performed in private. Beyond the very basics of what goes where, we aren’t given lessons on how to have great sex. We are just supposed to get it on and make it good, without any previous knowledge, experience, or training. You’d never see a person who has never driven before being told to jump into an Indy car and go win the race.

3. Without accurate information, we remain in information limbo, where we are not sure where to turn to get our questions answered. Unfortunately, most of us build our sexual knowledge on the foundation of myths, mixed messages, and misinformation. As a result, most of us are not living up to our full sexual potential.
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The sex education you get from school is more like the dangers-of-sex education, discussing pregnancy and STDs. We don’t learn how to have great sex.

5. Experience is a great teacher. Unfortunately, in this day and age, when it comes to sex, experience can also have deadly ramifications. You can’t just freely have as much sex as possible to gain sexual experience, today. No matter what your moral views of doing so are, there are deadly diseases that keep nearly every one of us from doing so.

6. As a result of the lack of good sexual education, it takes years for us to learn what our partners really want in bed, if we ever figure it out at all. We are also left less than fulfilled, because we don’t know how to assertively and effectively communicate our sexual wants, needs, desires, fantasies, and expectations in the bedroom. No one has ever taught us how to do this.

7. In a perfect world, sex education should begin at home. Parents should start very early in a child’s life teaching them all about sex. Ideally, they should cover such areas as how their bodies develop, to how reproduction works, to masturbation, to respect and self esteem, to the emotions involved in forming, maintaining, and ending relationships, to promoting their own values and methods for managing all of the sexual aspects of life. Parents are not going to be the only source sex education for their kids, so they have to be the best, most clear source. But, even sexually open parents rarely discuss the finer points of sensual lovemaking.

8. Many people (especially men) hate to admit we don’t know something, especially when it comes to sex. Well, don’t be too hard on yourself. How are we supposed to know this stuff? Where do we really learn about sex? Who teaches us? Nobody does! Nobody teaches us the real facts about how to have great sex and how to pleasure each other when we are younger because we aren’t supposed to have sex or talk about it. Yet one day, we are supposed to just somehow magically know.

9. And forget about asking someone for help - once we reach a certain age, our inquisitiveness becomes a liability. It’s no longer “cool” to ask questions. Doing so will prove to your friends that you are not very experienced, out of the loop, a virgin, or an idiot, so most of us pretend we know it all. We fake it. Well, now is the time to stop faking it and realize that if you want to learn to be a great lover to your partner, you have to learn about sex. Sex is a skill and now is the time to start learning it.

10. Sex is like playing a piano. Anyone can sit down, hammer on the keys, and make some noise. But to learn to make truly beautiful music, it takes knowledge, time, practice, dedication, and patience. We have to educate ourselves. The average adult has the sexual know-how of a 17-year-old. That’s when most of us stop learning about sex. Unless you actively seek to expand and improve your knowledge about sex, you will continue to have the sexual proficiency of a 17-year-old. Buy some good sex books, buy some instructional videos, join some online sexual discussion forums, and begin to educate yourself. You are bound to have a better and more satisfying sex life than those who choose not to do these things.