Written
By: Jenne
It
would be more than possible to write an entire website devoted
to the art of reading others body language, but here I'll just
scratch at the surface and try to bring out the most important
things, as these are what you really need to understand when it
comes to flirting.
Have
you ever simply sat in a bar and watched couples together? Or
watched others flirt? If you have then the chances are even though
you may not know it you already have a good understanding of the
differences between positive and negative body language.
When
it comes to body language there are basically two types of gestures:
open and closed. Learning how to read which type of gesture you
are receiving from someone you are flirting with or interested
in getting to know better is the first step to flirting success.
At this point though it is worth stating this is only an indicator
and many things can affect body language. If I'm having a really
bad day I may give off negative, closed gestures but at the same
time still be attracted to you.
Open
Gestures.
So lets take a look at open gestures first. Open gestures are
those that communicate to another person that you are interested
in what they have to say or in them per say.
1)
Butterflies in My Stomach: Once you've made eye contact with
someone watch how they react after they look away. If he/she plays
with their hair, adjusts an item of jewelry or simply fiddles
with their hands then it's a pretty good sign that they are attracted
to you.
2)
Open palms: Many people will expose their wrists or palms
to someone they are really interested in.
3)On
Target: How someone places their shoulders in relation to
you is a good indication of whether they are interested or not.
If the person has their upper body pointing towards you this again
is often a sure sign they are interested in you.
4)
The Forward Lean: This is one of the most obvious body language
signals to read. If someone is pointing their shoulders towards
you, while at the same time leaning forward, they are yours for
the taking -))
5)The
Legs Have It: If either the persons feet or legs are widened
the chances are they are showing you they are comfortable talking
to you as well as their surrounding.
6)
Eye To Eye: If someone is interested you will often find that
their pupils will get bigger or dilate, and by the same token
will get smaller is they are not. Bear in mind though surroundings
can have an effect on this. For example if you're outside on a
sunny day, someone's pupils may look small whether they are attracted
to you or not and visa versa.
7)
Smile You're on Candid Camera: If someone smiles at you when
you make contact it's generally a sure sign of interested but
you knew that already right?
8)
It's Funny You Should Say That: If someone laughs at just
about everything you say, then it's probably not because you tell
great jokes, more likely they are saying I like being with you.
You make me feel good and there's nothing funny about that -))
9)
Touchy Feely: Touching someone when talking to them is often
a sure sign of interest.
10)
Hair Do: Many women will flip their hair and then glance away
as a sign that they are attracted to someone. It's a way of attracting
attention and attention is what flirting is all about.
11)
Look at me: Often people will make eye contact and hold it
for longer than normal when they are interested in someone. This
can actually be uncomfortable to be the recipient of and if it
happens to you remember to smile back.
Closed
Gestures
Now Let's take a look at the closed gestures people often give
when they have little or no interest in someone:
1)
Crossed Arms: This is a sure sign that someone is either nervous,
agitated, uncomfortable or simply doesn't like you.
2)
Crossed Legs: Like crossed arms this is another obvious sign
of disinterest. Often though you may find the person is simply
nervous and leg crossing is a way of conveying that. If someone's
legs and arms are crossed then forget it, you have more chance
of going to the moon. One the other hand crossed legs that are
pointing towards you can be a nervous gesture.
3)
Leaning Back: Another closed gesture that is probably the
most obvious sign that someone simply isn't interested.
Improving
Your Chances Of Success.
By becoming a student of body language it's much easier to
work out who might be interested in you and who probably isn't.
Next time you're out and about take a good look at the people
around you. Watch the way people react to one another, not only
is this an interesting exercise and something I do quite often
it will help you learn the nuance's of body language which will
help improve your own chances of success or failure.
The
Games People Play:
If you're still skeptical about body language and the role it
can play in the dating game try the game of copycat and you'll
see that it really does work.
Make
eye contact with someone and smile, then glance at your watch,
while counting to three, then look back at that certain someone.
If they too are looking at their watch then you are certainly
in with a chance -)) By looking at your watch, you have sparked
their curiosity and they will likely be wondering what you are
waiting for, and with no other source to gather information from,
they will look at their own watch to try to at least determine
the time of your expected event.
So
now you have the basics go out there and work on your body language
skills and have some fun
